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Old 04-19-2008   #1
Dark
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Default Dealing With Bullies

First off, let me explain "bullies" and "bullying."
Most bullies are people with low self-esteem. They are trying to make themselves feel more important, and when they pick on someone else, it makes them feel great and almighty. Some bullies are just attention-seekers. They think that bullying is a way to become popular or a way to always get what they want. Some bullies come from abusive families. They probably think that being angry, insulting, and pushing people around is the normal way to act because they're copying what they've witnessed in their home. Bullies like to pick on someone they think they can control--kids who get upset easily or have trouble standing up for themselves.

Bullying can be a lot of things, most of which are: sexual harassment, teasing, calling names/insulting, physically pushing/attacking, threatening or hazing, damaging or stealing belongings, and sending upsetting cell phone or email messages. The list is not limited to just this, however.

So what now?
Wherever you are, you should know that you have the right to feel safe and not threatened by someone else. Bullying is a horrible thing to have to deal with. I know it from personal experience, and I know I never want it to happen again. It hurts and scares you. Wherever this bullying is happening, whether it be school or online, it still hurts all the same. I was sexually harassed during my French class, and as the days went on, I came to dread and hate French. But, I was able to get a hold of the problem and stop it.

What you should do is to first follow these tips--
Note: most of these don't apply to cyber-bullying, but can be easily bent and applied to your case.
[1] Don't give the bully a chance to bully you. Try to avoid the bully.this doesn't mean skip class, if it relates to school, but you could take another way to your class or destination. If this is online, then block/blacklist them.
[2] Stand tall and be brave when confronting the bully. If you're scared of someone, then you probably won't feel so brave. However, if you can just stand up straight,look them in the eyes, and tell them to stop, then that might just work. Feel good about yourself, and you'll find yourself being much more confident.
[3] Get a friend to come with you. Bullies probably won't try to get you when you're with someone else or in a group.
[4] Try ignoring the bully. I know this is difficult for a lot of people. I mean--if someone insults you, doesn't that make you feel hurt? Just pretend you didn't hear the bully and walk away to somewhere safer. This means try not to show your feelings.
[5] Don't bully back. Don't hit, kick, insult, or threaten back to deal with someone bullying yourself or your friends. Fighting back just satisfies a bully's hunger for drama, and plus, it's dangerous.
[6] Most importantly! Tell an adult or someone much older than you right away. Find an adult you trust, and tell them your problem. Teachers, parents, and administration of a certain website can all help to stop what's going on. Sometimes bullies stop as soon as an adult knows from fear of punishment. Note--this doesn't make you a tattle-tale about something small. Bullying is wrong, and it helps a lot if everyone who gets bullied or sees someone being bullied speaks up about it.

I've done that. So...?
Hopefully, this bullying will cease. If not, keep telling an adult because things like this must be stopped. Now let me tell you something from my run-in with bullies-- things do get better. It's difficult to heal from a horrible experience, but before you know it, things will be back to normal. Yes, honestly, I'm still scared of going to French, but I have supportive friends, and it's great to have them there. And also, thank the people that helped you. It should make you glad that people care for your well-being and safety.

Questions? Comments?
I'm here to talk to you. Drop me a PM, or just comment here if you'd like. I would love to help with anything you're dealing with.
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Old 04-19-2008   #2
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Default Re: Dealing With Bullies

This is a really great article(?). I'm having problems with the other girls at my school and they always insults me and stuff. I always ignore them, though sometimes I feel like I want to cry and fight back. But I know fighting back would make it more worse.
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Old 04-19-2008   #3
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Default Re: Dealing With Bullies

This is a very well written article. Well done, I am sure a lot of people will find it useful.
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Old 04-19-2008   #4
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Default Re: Dealing With Bullies

Originally Posted by cheeky_angel004
This is a really great article(?). I'm having problems with the other girls at my school and they always insults me and stuff. I always ignore them, though sometimes I feel like I want to cry and fight back. But I know fighting back would make it more worse.
It's normal to feel like you want to cry and fight back. I know I felt like that too.
But important thing is that you don't.
Tell a teacher, and have this stopped now.

Originally Posted by Lyncheh
This is a very well written article. Well done, I am sure a lot of people will find it useful.
Thank you.
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Old 04-19-2008   #5
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Default Re: Dealing With Bullies

Wow. You're real good at writing.

ANDDDD~ I now know what you all mean by essay/article!
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Old 04-19-2008   #6
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Default Re: Dealing With Bullies

Originally Posted by Timelord
Wow. You're real good at writing.

ANDDDD~ I now know what you all mean by essay/article!
Er, I try to be.

Great. <3
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Old 04-19-2008   #7
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Default Re: Dealing With Bullies

This has been added to my bookmarks/favorites.
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Old 04-19-2008   #8
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Default Re: Dealing With Bullies

Great to know, RT.
I really hope your situation gets better.
<3
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Old 04-19-2008   #9
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Default Re: Dealing With Bullies

May I suggest that you should mention that bullying is a criminal act and is the violation of the human right to have a safe, fear-free life?
Including the law into this issue might help in stopping bulling.
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Old 04-19-2008   #10
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Default Re: Dealing With Bullies

That is a very good point.
I can't edit my post anymore, unfortunately.
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